It’s hard to believe it’s mid-August already. The days are going by so quickly and it seems like our Lachlan is growing up so fast. He is pulling himself up on everything (and everyone) and is trying to “cruise”. He has even taken ONE unassisted step (followed by falling). He clearly recognizes so many words now too, which is so much fun to watch (he will look for the word you are saying until his eyes find it):
- papi (k’s dad)
- dogaroo (k’s mom)
- retta lee (our oldest beagle)
- bentley (our middle beagle)
- libbie (our youngest beagle)
- all of k’s siblings names
- red bird (e.ric carle cube)
- mocha (blanket)
- fire extinguisher
- puff (organic sweet potato and banana puffs)
- bite (organic yogurt and fruit bites)
- “big hug”
- “high five”
I can’t believe he will be 8 months old this month. People always told me when Lach was itty bitty …. “enjoy every moment because it goes by so fast”. It truly does! Some days I just look at him and think, “where has my baby gone?” He is becoming such a little man now. We are taking him to Baltimore’s Inner Harbor this weekend to meet up with some girls from blogland and their adorable boy. Planning to check out the zoo and enjoy some time relaxin by the pool. I can’t wait to see his expression when he sees all the animals.
Now to the main reason I was going to blog today: I’ve been craving chocolate for days and just yesterday I told K that I felt like I had gained 15 pounds; my clothes were tighter than normal and I felt huge. This morning I woke up with killer lower back pain, but thought it must have been how I slept (with Lach taking up most of the bed, and me sleeping semi-on-the-frame) last night. Boy was I surprised when I went to the bathroom and saw blood. Immediate thought: “Oh no! What’s wrong with me?” Second thought: “Oh wait. This is normal.” Everything makes sense now…the chocolate cravings, back pain, bloating.
AF has returned. Not thrilled, but knew it had to happen eventually. With the arrival of AF brings weird feelings. It’s weird to be on my period again after not having had one since March of last year. But, I don’t have any cramps – so that is something to be thankful for. I must now get back to TTC basics. I will have to break out the BBT thermometor again (how does that work with so many night-time wakeups?), up-grade my FF membership and try to track ovulation (am I even ovulating?) again. On a positive note, this gives me several months of getting to know my cycles again before we start this whole process again (are we crazy doing it so soon?).
November will bring known donor re-testing, and then December we will start home ICIs/IVI’s. I have no idea how long it will take for me to get pregnant again. We are giving ourselves 5 months of trying (Dec-Apr). If it doesn’t happen then, we will take a break during K’s busy time at work and rethink things several months later. I am sort of excited….both K and I want Lach to having a sibling close in age to him. I’m a little nervous too….nervous about how to keep up with a constantly-on-the-go boy while possibly being preggo….then how to keep with that constantly-on-the-go boy while having a newborn……..before even worrying about that…..I’m nervous that we may really struggle to get pregnant a second time….nervous that it will be a lot to handle if it happens right away…..nervously questioning if I could love another child as much as I love my son. One day at a time I guess. More than nervousness is excitement though. Just to be trying soon. Just the possibility of bringing another little person into our small family that I adore so much. I feel like my heart can’t possibly love more than it does now…..can it? K really would love me to get pregnant in Feb….she wants a November baby (right around our 9th aniversary to be precise). We shall see. I feel very relaxed about TTC this second time. We are pretty sure that this will be our last baby….so….when it happens, it happens….I don’t think I’ll be as stressed out this time. I almost felt an urgency the first time….I don’t think I’ll feel that way with TTC#2. But maybe I’m just saying that now, and when the time comes I’ll be peeing on the sticks at 8DPO. I just might not be able to resist. But right now, I feel very blessed and very thankful that it happened for us the first time. Thankful that I have a healthy son and partner and that we have so much love in our lives. I wish that for every person reading this today. Health, happiness and the family you have always desired.