Not Meant To Be



I can’t pretend that everything’s alright.  Temp dropped way down. 98.21.  Still above the coverline, but AF is surely coming.  We’re out.  2 months of trying with fresh sperm, perfectly-timed.  We’ve talked about trying to find another KD.  We’ll maybe do a few more cycles, and then go from there.  I’m sad now, but we’ll get through it, and things will be alright again for another try.



18 thoughts on “Not Meant To Be

  1. Ahh shit. I came over here to comment after reading your previous post (minus the update) which had come through my Bloglines. I was excited for you. And then this. I’m so sorry. I know it’s so hard.

  2. Ack. Am sorry too, love. However I think your donor is gold dust, so maybe give him another go or two? That’s just my view anyway! Hugs. xx

  3. I’m sorry it’s not working out…
    but… it’s not time to give up on your donor! The stats I’ve read is that you have a 25% chance of getting pregnant each cycle, and it takes a typical (healthy) woman 6 cycles! Your donor needs 4-5 more tries! I wouldn’t chalk it up to a problem, rather just the odds…

  4. What Dana said! Give him a few more tries. Don’t assume either of you have a problem, you don’t.
    I’m so sorry. Big hugs. Go and have a drink with your fiancee.

  5. So sorry to hear that things are looking like a BFP this time. I don’t think you should count yourself out until AF actually comes though. And if in fact it is a BFN, I think give your KD a few more chances…I like dana’s stats (reassuring for me too).
    Take care of yourselves and each other.

  6. i was so excited to see a new post – i’m so sorry it didn’t work out this month. I second Dana’s stats that what our RE told us over and over again. for us it proved to be true…don’t give up… just keep your head up and keep going.

  7. Ok, surely this is no consolation, but “they say” that it takes, fertile, hetero couples on average about a year to conceive… Those numbers suck asss- and, it took us 7 IUIs to get knocked up- don’t lose hope sister. BFNs will get less painful BTW- by the 5th BFN for us- I was totally numb to it. Well, maybe a tad down, but pretty much numb.

  8. i’m sorry to hear it. Try and remember, though it’s difficult I know, many hetero couples struggle with trying to get pregnant and it often takes months before it happens with well timed cycles and unlimited fresh sperm as well. it seems crazy that it would be so difficult yet so many accidental pregnancies happen every day. I don’t have an explanation for that except to say hang in there and keep on trying. It’s without a doubt the most stressful process but once your baby arrives, it will all be a distant memory. wishing you guys peace during the process…

  9. Getting the timing right is really tricky. From my amateur look at your chart, I think your insems were a bit too early. Your o could have happened on day 21. You insemmed the same day of the positive OPK, right? You may want to try insemming the next morning next round? Good luck

  10. Oh crap, hon. I had such high hopes for you this time! I agree with others, though: keep the donor for awhile longer. Remember, even when everything’s perfect, there’s only a 20% chance each cycle, so this doesn’t mean anything was wrong. That doesn’t make any of this any easier though.

    For now, indulge in some comfort–food, drinks, time together–whatever it takes, and know that in just a couple of weeks, you’ll be at this all over again.

    Big hugs to you both. xoxo

  11. you’ve only tried twice with this donor? it took my partner and i 12 IUI tries with fresh sperm to get pregnant.

    it takes an average of a year for a healthy woman to concieve. changing donors now doesn’t make any sense.

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