Postponed Trip August 30, 2007

 

Work is insanely busy…we decided (very late, I might add) to delay the trip! We’re now planning it for the middle of November, when work won’t be so crazy, and we can actually get more time off.

 Why This Is A Good Thing:

1. We’ll be up North on vacation for our SIX year anniversary!

2. More FF Charts for the doctor to look at (one chart isn’t really enough anyway!)

3. More time to PLAN!! …………..book hotels, stuff to do, etc…..

4. Gives me a bit of time to shed a few pounds before my physical.

5. We can save a bit more money!

We were both really looking forward to getting away….spending some quality time together and enjoying a full week away from work…..but, we decided that it is best to put off going on our little holiday until later in the year.  Regardless though, we’re taking tomorrow off of work and sleeping in…..relaxing….(the 12+ hours on our feet at work every day are really draining!)….not to mention Monday we have off as well.  It’s not so bad.  I could definitely settle for a lazy day in bed…..and heading to the River one day this weekend with our 3 beagles. We will still have our romantic holiday…it will just have to be shorter…..and in Richmond! Hope you all enjoy the long weekend!

Roadtrip & Ramblings August 25, 2007

We’re leaving for Toronto on Thursday! Karli is finally taking some vacation days…..how excited am I? We have been together for close to six years, and have never gone on a vacation together. We’ve gone away for a weekend here and there, but never taken a WHOLE WEEK away. Her work at the Screen Printing shop is so demanding….things sort of seem to fall apart when she’s gone. Well, she’s working a lot of overtime to make sure things will be okay in our absence…..and I am thrilled. For those of you who don’t know, I am actually from Toronto….and we will be around my “home town” for the first few days.

I am getting checked out by my home physician to make sure we have the go-ahead for trying to get pregnant. She will just give me a routine physical……pap smear and all that loveliness….oh joy oh bliss……and run bloodwork. I’m not looking forward to this physical too much. I’ve gained 23 lbs since January, and I was at an ideal weight for my last physical…..I wonder if she’ll tell me to get this weight off before ttc. Ugh, I really want to lose it – I am just SO not motivated right now. But, as I can’t really do up my jeans anymore, I really need to get it under control! Anyway, she will most likely send me for a pelvic ultrasound (she was concerned about the number of cysts on my ovaries at one point) and possibly run some other tests as well. I just hope everything comes back clear and we will be good to go for our January insemination!

Everyone keeps asking me if I will visit my family when I go home……I haven’t seen any of my brothers or my mom & dad since January (when there was a pretty big blowup, so to speak)….that is a long time, and it makes me very sad. We’re not talking at all. I’m not telling them I’m coming…..as it will only make things worse than they already are. They don’t accept (in ANY sense) “my lifestyle” or my girlfriend. It just makes me sick inside….and I wish so badly that I could have a family that supported me in every aspect of my life. I wish I could bring Karli over for Thanksgiving dinner….that they could just see how much we love each other. I wish they could be Nana and Papa to the little one in the future. Too many painful experiences tells me just to stay away right now. Karli keeps reminding me that we need to be around supportive people right now, and she’s absolutely right. Basically it just sucks. I usually keep my mind off of it, but sometimes the sadness comes in waves. I’m sad for them, what they will lose out on if they don’t start coming around. And I’m sad for me too. I really miss them. Why can’t life just be easy?

Anyway, despite that depressing stuff, I’m enthusiastically looking forward to this trip. After a few days in Toronto, we’re going to drive to Montreal and have a lovely romantic getaway It will be so nice to have that time together!! Karli hasn’t been back to Canada in several years, so I’m really looking forward to taking her to a few special places and just having fun….I really want her to just relax and not think about work. Not to mention, this will be our last getaway as a couple (most likely!) as we probably won’t go on a big trip before we have the baby (again, if ttc goes smoothly). It’s a 12 hour drive to Toronto from Richmond………..we always have so much fun together on road trips! Karli gets SO tired though, this time I’ll be armed with sweet playlists on the iPod and TRIVIA to keep her awake.

Have any of you heard of a product called FERTELL (www.fertell.com)? We’re getting the questionnaire back from our known donor on Monday (medical history, etc), and we were thinking we might try this product.  It is a HOME FERTILITY test.  They have it for men and women.  We are going to get lots of tests done on our donor, but thought this was a more inexpensive and convenient way to test his sperm motility before we even get further along in the process.  That way we’re not injecting sperm that may not even be able to swim! It is a home test (how cool), FDA approved (I would hope so!) and 96% accurate. I would be curious to see if anyone had any thoughts on it, although I know most of you are using anonymous donors….

Jumping topics again….today is CD24 and I’m still wondering why my chart hasn’t shown ovulation. Is it possible that I ovulated and my temperature is not reflecting it? If any of you have any words of wisdom and have some time to glance at my chart below, I’d appreciate your input (yet again)! Thanks guys

Baby Bargains & Bizarre Charts August 18, 2007

We have heard A LOT lately about this book, “Baby Bargains 2007“. It’s been on Oprah, The Today Show, etc….and created quite the hype. Here’s a snippet off the back cover:

“Congratulations, you’re expecting a baby! What you may not be expecting is all of the requisite gear you “need” to look after your dear bundle. Fear not. Denise and Alan Fields, authors of Bridal Bargains, are here to tell you what’s super and what’s silly, and how to find it at the best price!”

Okay, I know it’s early….but we’re lesbians. And we’re planning in advance. Way in advance….as we’re not even pregnant yet. Nevertheless, we were going to buy this book in the near future…..when, funny enough, Karli heard an advertisement on the radio that the author, Alan Fields, was going to be at our local baby store – USA BABY – in Richmond – giving away free copies! Whoo Hoo!!!! We were excited. We showed up bright (not really) and early (not so much) at 10am. We are SO prepared. Turns out that he wasn’t ACTUALLY showing up until 1pm…..Okay, I GUESS we can look around the store at beautiful baby furniture and adorable nursery decor…………Time well spent….I think we’ve decided what patterns and collection we are going to go with for the nursery….but more on that later…..

Anyway, we grabbed some lunch, ran to Old Navy to look for other cute maternity and baby stuff (we obviously have an addiction….) and got back to the store around 1:30 or so. We COULD NOT find a parking space. I mean, by the amount of people, you’d think that they were giving out COLD HARD CASH. We parked aways away, and walked in, and snagged one of the last copies!! The author talked to us for awhile about the bugaboo stroller that we have our hearts set on….and signed a copy to us! How sweet. We are going to read the book together….but we have glanced at a few pages, and it looks like a great read.

Do any of you have this book? If not, I would recommend getting a copy. It would also make a great gift for a baby shower! I think it will be our baby shopping Bible. Truly. Especially with articles like, “The Top Ten Baby Products That Should Be Banned”.

Okay, switching gears completely, I need some desperate help on BBT charting. Today is CD17 for me. I’m trying to read my chart, and with not much luck, I might add. I started charting on CD6……I’m sure by now I must have ovulated…..but I just don’t see the temperature dip and rise that I was expecting…..any input on this would be much appreciated! I even had my first experience today peeing on a stick with my first OPK test! Just wanted to see if my LH surge was later in my cycle or something. The last few days, I’ve had all the other signs…….ovulation pain, cervical fluid, etc…..is it just that I missed the LH surge and that my chart doesn’t show the temp stuff it’s supposed to….or am I completely reading it wrong? What cycle day do you think showed that I was about to ovulate?? Ahhh, this stuff is so confusing to me! Any help would be great! Many thanks girls!

I’m just plain HAPPY. August 14, 2007

Karli and I are even more excited about the whole ttc process…….is that possible?

We just got back from our discussion group meeting, and I just had to write on how very happy I feel inside!! Not only was our group topic on Lesbian Insemination/Parenting, but we had TWO awesome couples come in to talk about their own personal journeys through ttc, pregnancy and parenting. We walked away from there even MORE excited…..how that’s possible, I don’t know, but it was just so cool. Each of these couples have beautiful children (the first couple in their 30s had a 2 yr old & a 5 yr old, the second couple had a 3 year old & a baby just under a year). It just brought such a smile to my face….. those adorable, sweet kids were born from such love. Life is a truly amazing thing.

Ps. Thanks Lynn for the responses…I appreciate so much the fact that there is this online community of support!! I think that will be such an outlet for us during this whole process. It’s nice to have somewhere to get advice, or just vent. Thanks for cluing me in to blogging!!

Finally, OUR TOPIC! August 13, 2007

Karli and I attend a lesbian discussion group every other Tuesday evening. It’s sort of our “lesbian interaction” for the month (besides hanging out with close friends now and then). The members of the group range in age (more than a handful are inching towards retirement) and personality. I don’t think Karli and myself are the norm in the group (or in the community in general). We’re young and stable(been together for close to 6 yrs), committed to each other, and NOT about drama, and definitely not into the “club scene”. Why does it SEEM that most of the young lesbian couples surrounding us are only into sleeping around and getting drunk….? We meet a new couple and always hope they’ll be sort of on the same page as us…….and then after a few minutes of chatting, Karli and I both give each other that look. At what age will they grow out of this? And why did we never get INTO it to begin with?

We are the youngest couple that actively participates in our discussion group. The average age of most of these women is between 36-66. Where are all the young women? Is this a Richmond thing? We’re finding it rather difficult. We joined the group 2 years ago to have some positive social interaction with lesbian women in our area.  Attendance in the group has been a little weak lately…..maybe it’s the summer months…..maybe people are just getting sick of the drama.  I know I am. Not just that, but SOME of the ladies seem bitter about life in general, and don’t seem overly happy. Ugh, talk about depressing….I know what you’re thinking, “Why WOULD any young lesbians want to go to this group?”.

Well, I still have hope for it. We’re working on bringing some new flavour to the group. And, instead of topics like, “Lesbian Retirement Living”, (a SLIGHT exaggeration of the types of topics we have had, but still……) Karli has been suggesting things like, “Lesbian SEX.” Her outrageous and witty comments have brought a lot of laughter and life to the group lately. Some of the older folk have strangely missed the last few meetings….. he he, are we bad people? Karli always jokes around and says to me that she is purposely picking topics of little or no interest to them so they won’t attend!! For some of my lovely older lesbians that DO attend our group, you know I am not speaking about you!!! Really, are we terrible? *Although I often appreciate the insight of the “mature” lesbian couples, at the same time……it is so painstakingly clear that we are from two very different generations: One lady in her early 60’s told us that if you (and I quote…) ‘have to use sex toys in your relationship, you have problems’. (Little did she know her partner of 32 years approached us afterwards and apologized for the comment and stated that she really wished her woman was more “open to that sort of thing” in their relationship.) …………Ouch.*

I finally have been stepping up as well, and suggesting topics that would be of interest to me personally. And, sure enough, they picked my topic! One woman was so intrigued with my suggestion that she even located GUEST SPEAKERS! So, tomorrow night we have a couple coming in to talk about LESBIAN INSEMINATION and PARENTING. Whoo hoo! They chose an anonymous donor, and now have a toddler and an infant and have been down the very path that we are about to travel along. Long story short (actually, nothing about this post was SHORT)…..I’m really looking forward to hearing their story!!

The First Chapter August 13, 2007

And so the Chronicles of Conception begins!

So….for starters, a little info: We’re two girls……..both in our mid-twenties. We met in 2001…..and it seemed like we just couldn’t get enough of each other. Nothing really has changed. I still never get sick of K. We just click. How cliche, I know…….but it’s the truth. She is so smart and funny; she makes me laugh till I cry. I love that about her. We’ve done a lot of growing up in our 5 years together, and been through more than any couple should. She’s my best friend and the love of my life, and now we’re dreaming of having babies. I can’t believe that in a few months, this whole TTC “idea” will actually be a reality. We are going to start TTC in January of this coming year, and we can’t wait. We’re planning well in advance…..having all our ducks in a row can’t be a bad thing I guess!

I’ve gotten the books, and we’ve made up our mind that we will be using a known donor – a good friend of ours, around our age, that doesn’t want to have children of his own. What a gift!

I hope this will be a place to connect to others traveling down the same road as us……that it will be a place to find and give support through all the ups and downs that come along with trying to conceive, and hopefully, before long, it will be somewhere to vent about morning sickness, and all the fun (and not-so-fun) things of being pregnant. I am so excited to start this next phase of our life. I look at K and know what an amazing Momma she’ll be. Our child will be so loved and wanted.

January is still months away. We have time. Right now I’m vicariously living through other lesbian TTC blogs. I gotta be honest, it’s fun! I never knew there were so many lesbians out there, dreaming baby dreams, just like us.

We have a lot to do before we start trying…..we are going to get married, and go on a honeymoon….start a business and plan a move. Life is constantly changing, and we’ll have to make many adjustments before January…..but we have already begun the journey………